March 07, 2012

Struggles.

Last week, Jasmine Star began her presentation talking about something that really resonated with me. Our struggles. She encouraged us to share our struggles. To put them on the outside. Because, as she pointed out -

Our struggles connect us.

And it is so true. The people I connect with the most are usually those who share the struggles in their life or who I share my struggles with; because, either I say "I've been there - you're not alone!" OR they say to me "I've been there - YOU are not alone!" And it is so comforting to know that we are not alone in our struggles.

I asked myself why I didn't share more of the things I'm struggling with on this blog. And I realized, it's because I don't want to seem weak. Or inadequate. Unable to handle the struggles life throws at me.

But, that's not what it's about. It about sharing the very things that connect us.

To kick off the start of sharing more of the not so bright and shiny parts of my life, here, are some things I'm struggling with lately.

Not having done a photo shoot in 4 months.

This just plain sucks. I miss taking photo's of people. I don't know how to go about changing that down here. I do know that this will change soon though - moving back to a country where I know more than one other person ;)

Being lonely.

We are kind of living a charmed life right now - we are so blessed to have this opportunity to live down here. But still...Scott golfs a lot and I stay home a lot. I am the master of entertaining myself but it sometimes get lonely here at our little apartment.

Not being able to afford top of the line equipment.

It's just not in the cards right now. Camera equipment is super expensive. But, I'm gonna rock out the gear I do have and no one will ever know I don't have the $1500 lens. Or at least that's what I'm striving for!

Whether or not to cut my hair.

I know, my struggles are way deep.

Whether or not to share this post.

Okay, obviously I shared it. Part of me wanted to click delete and post something cute and witty instead with some pretty pictures; but, another part of Jasmine's talk was about how we can work through the struggle and what we can learn from it as well. This is me working through my fear of sharing my struggles.

And to end off - photo evidence of another struggle. Film photography. The film in the camera was super old and so the colours are way off they all look a little dingy but I still like the way these photo's feel. This is definitely a struggle I'm planning on working through.

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2 comments:

The Smith's said...

that is a very strong post. I am proud of you

Amy Demos said...

GAHHH This is amazing. I'm so proud of you! You just resonated with me in so many ways. You're going to do big things girl.